People said to the outside world: "He is just a roommate."
This sentence sounds like a joke, like an understatement to cover up something, but the moment it is said, the thing hidden inside is heavier than we imagined.
It was a kind of silent loneliness, a kind of alienation when two people were together, but it seemed as if they didn't exist.
Loneliness can take many forms: eating alone, watching movies, or shopping alone; these loneliness are easy to recognize because they are obvious.
But the loneliness of two people together is much more complicated. It is hidden in daily life, in the miss of the eyes, and in the careless "hmm".
When people start to say to friends, colleagues, or even themselves: "He's just a roommate," it's not because the relationship is really as simple as a roommate, but because it's the easiest form to explain.
This is so much easier than saying, "We're together, but I still feel lonely."
The loneliness of two people together is a kind of misplaced loneliness.
When you go home and want to share the trivial matters of the day, but you only get a casual nod from the other person; when you sit on the same sofa, but each of you lowers your head and scrolls through your mobile phone; when you have something to say, but the other person is busy avoiding it; this kind of Loneliness is more cruel than being alone.
On the surface, you may appear to be together, but your souls seem to be living on different planets.
When a person is alone, he is at least honest, because you know very well that you only have yourself.
But the loneliness between two people is a betrayal of expectations.
You thought the other person would understand you, support you, and make you feel needed, but in the end you found that you were just struggling alone in a relationship.
Because it makes you understand that "being together" is not the antidote to loneliness, but sometimes it is the catalyst for loneliness.
Loneliness can sometimes be tolerated, but loneliness between two people is scary.
Because it tells you from time to time that sometimes "being together" does not necessarily bring comfort, but instead amplifies loneliness.
Those emptiness that you don't want to admit, those relationships that you pretend to be okay, are nakedly exposed in such loneliness.
People often rush into a relationship in order to escape one's loneliness.
But when relationships exist only in form, loneliness becomes more acute.
At this time, you start to say to the outside world: "He is just a roommate." In fact, you are just convincing yourself to accept this status quo.
You thought that having one person living under the same roof would bring some warmth to your life; but in the end, you find that not having the company of communication will only make the desertion more obvious.
The loneliness of two people together is actually the disintegration of a relationship.
It is not the failure of love, but the helplessness when friendship or coexistence cannot be maintained.
Saying "he is just a roommate" is to preserve the last dignity to the outside world, but it is also a kind of admission: "We can no longer rely on each other."
This kind of loneliness is scary, but it also makes people reflect.
Why do we seek companionship?
Is it to make life more meaningful, or is it just that you are afraid of facing yourself?
Maybe instead of being afraid of being alone, it’s better to learn to get along with yourself.
When we dare to face one's loneliness honestly, it is possible to find someone who can truly accompany us and understand us.
At that time, we no longer need to say "he is just a roommate" to the outside world, because the love and connection do not need any explanation.
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Loneliness is not terrible, what is terrible is self-deception.
Instead of being afraid of being alone, it is better to grow in loneliness and find your own completeness and abundance.
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